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| I seem to be in a really good mood today, with no explanation of why!? (well, there may be some contributing factors but still.)
So, I feel pretty good. How's that for an emo blog?
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| I just noticed: the toilet paper in our office has an embossed pattern of little hearts on it. Seemed kind of remarkable.
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| Here's a quote I ran into the other day:
"The sense of unhappiness is so much easier to convey than that of
happiness. In misery we seem aware of our own existence, even though it
may be in the form of a monstrous egotism: this pain of mine is
individual, this nerve that winces belongs to me and to no other. But
happiness annihilates us: we lose our identity." -Graham Greene
I read this and identified with it, but now, a few days and a cup of coffee with Wally later, I am challenged by it. 'Monstrous egotism' indeed. Is my pain really so unique? Do I really think everyone else has it so much better? Sometimes I do, and in those times I need to realize that everyone has experienced or will experience feelings of loneliness, loss and heartache. Sometimes these come in full force, through some unwelcome event, and sometimes they come in small waves, maybe once daily- say, an inexplicable sensation of loneliness in the late afternoon. They may come in broad variety but let it be said- pain and misery know no strangers, they show no partiality.
And happiness, do I forget my existence in happiness? Is my identity (as I see it) wrapped up in my miseries? I am loathe to consider it for fear of the answer. This makes me want to be mindful to lay personal claim to my every laugh and smile, to every instance that produces in me feelings of comfort, pleasure, joy and contentment. These are equally mine, they belong to me. My identity exists in both happy and sad circumstances; I am defined by neither but I experience (and possess) both.
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| I know this isn't much of a topic for a blog post, but I'm happy to report that late Sunday night I stumbled upon a PBS broadcasting of the first episode of Foyle's War season 5! (Note under 'currently watching' that it's not even out on DVD in the U.S. yet!) I was excited, but unable to stay up 'til 2:30am, and therefore grateful for my ancient VHS recorder (due to my economy which does not afford the luxuries of tivo or dvr). Last night I watched the magic that is Foyle's War. It was great, as always, though sadly I must tell you my VHS player is on it's last leg, periodically adding a magnetic warble to the image. Yes, very sad in this day of plasma screens and high def. As with cell phones, I feel like the last hold-out. And similarly, once I do have dvr and high def, I'm sure I'll wonder how I ever lived without it. That seems kind of sick though, so let's hope not. Cell phones, on the other hand, are a necessity to communication, which is something I value. But then, I do also value good tv shows...
The excitement of Foyle's War season 5 does seem like a blog-worthy subject given that at a party Saturday night I was addressed not once but twice in conversation about tv shows I have advertised on my blog. One friend told me she recently watched season 1 of Veronica Mars and agrees with me that it's good, though she never thought it would be and would never have watched it if her husband hadn't brought it home and made her. Another friend asked me if I've seen Scrubs (which is very funny to me, kind of like me with cell phones and high def -where has this person been?) ...she said oh it's funny, it's good, that she never realized... I whole-heartedly agreed.
Well, my easy-access chance to watch all of Scrubs in sequential order has recently left town, along with the impetus for my own recently acquired tv-watching tendencies. Fred & Molly. Such memories-- watching NUMB3RS on a snowy screen (Aha! maybe they also influenced me to reject available technological improvements in television viewing!). :) They introduced me to Veronica Mars, Firefly, and Wonderfalls... all excellent cancelled tv shows. Molly and I began our LOST fan-ship around the same time, and luckily LOST has not had a similar fate, though next season is contracted to be it's last. Maybe it's true what they say about all good things coming to an end. Yesterday I was in this mind-set a bit, dwelling on the loss incurred when friends move away, specifically the loss of Fred & Molly as they move to Spokane, but I was buoyed by knowing the quality and character of their friendship, and knowing that THAT is not lost at all. Some good things don't end.
Cheers to Fred, Molly and Liam, currently somewhere between Muncie and Spokane, and many happy returns.
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| Sad news, today Laura told me she's leaving us come August 8th.
Every time I get close to someone, this is what happens! (mock-drama, I'm okay...)
*In this post, 'Laura' is referring to work-Laura. (I also have a sister-Laura and a friend-Laura, thus the distinctions.)
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